Nothing Changes When Nothing is Changed

By Nadine Briggs and Donna Shea

Lately I have been talking with a lot parents and teens about anxiety. I had one teen boy recently pull me aside during social group and say “Miss Nadine, I need help with my anxiety.” I proceeded to tell him several steps he could take to lessen his anxiety and he smirked at me. He did not want to hear what I had to tell him.

The message was that if you want to lessen your anxiety and be happier, then there are things you can do to achieve that. The part he didn’t like was that HE had to do those things. I truly believe that he wanted me to do it for him. Maybe sprinkle some magic dust or something. He had a huge case of what we call the “yeah, buts…”. People with anxiety will give all kinds of reasons as to why they shouldn’t do anything to lessen their anxiety. Halfhearted attempts aren’t enough to make change. There needs to be a commitment to make life better by the person who wants the better life. No amount of coaching, therapy or any type of intervention will improve someone’s quality of life if they refuse to make changes for themselves.

The good things in life take effort. Nothing worth having is easy to come by. I could type so many different cliché-type phrases here and all would be true. You and you alone are in charge of you and nothing changes if nothing is changed. Kick the “yeah, buts…” to the curb and strive for happiness. No one has ever regretted managing their lives better but many regret the time lost when they don’t.