Give Hope a Chance: Support Friendship at the Start of the School Year

By Nadine Briggs and Donna Shea

Each new school year brings the chance for kids to make new connections with potential friends. Parents look forward to their kids having a fresh start. They are hopeful that this year will bring the right mix of kids for their child to make friends. As your child hopped onto the bus on the first day of school, were your fingers crossed? We’ve been there.

As the saying goes, give hope a chance. If your child has had a history of social difficulties, hope may not be enough to ensure success this school year. In our experience, most families wait to provide social support when they hear concern from their child’s teacher at the October parent/teacher conferences. Some parents take action at that time to put support in place but others take longer to figure out next steps. Before they know it, the holidays are upon them and they don’t have the time to fit in an additional activity. Parent wait until the new year, and that’s when our phones ring like crazy for kids who need social support. By then, many months have passed for the child who hasn’t made any friends and our social groups are often filled. Your child might end up on a waiting list for social support.

We suggest giving your child support on the front end of the school year. If kids make friends and all is going well, then you can discontinue support at that point. Support can include lunch bunch, recess club, or an after school social skills group like Donna and I run in MA. Perhaps touch base with the school guidance counselor and ask them to check in regularly with your child. Or you can create a routine of reading a chapter each day from How to Make & Keep Friends: Tips for Kids to Overcome 50 Common Social Challenges.

Being hopeful is great but not always enough. Feeling accepted and having friends is an important part of the school experience and your child’s happiness. Give your child the best chance for social success. Give hope a chance.